I felt my extreme anxiety slowly ebb away as I listened to her regular heartbeat below my ear. Her arms, her warmth and the feel of her skin next to mine comforted my fears. I felt my own heartbeat slow and match the rhythm of hers.She whispered softly in my ear, “It’s okay, baby, everything is alright. Please don’t cry, I’m right here with you.”Even in the midst of my fears and the sadness I had felt, my body was already betraying me. I had hardened and it was poking into the side of Debbie’s thigh. We both felt it but left its physical presence unspoken between us. Debbie was still more concerned with my emotional well being.She asked, “Was it too much to watch, baby? I’m so sorry it hurts you.”I thought for a moment before answering. I knew that I had to be completely honest with Deb if we were to have any semblance of understanding what we had both just experienced. Not being honest would result in superficial and potentially hurtful consequences for our marriage. That, I could. I quickly agreed with a sense of pride, which he might want to show me off to his friends. At any rate, the sweet, soft kiss calmed me down, and I felt at ease as he introduced me to everyone at the party. I also downed a few cocktails as we mingled a little before a quick exit. But as we said our goodbyes, a good-looking guy asked if he could get a ride with us. I didn't think anything of it since most everyone was drinking until we had to get into his truck. Once inside the truck, I found myself between these two handsome, brawny men - much more mature and worldly than I was used to - I was all alone squashed between the two of them. I found out this was his best-friend, who he'd done everything with since they had known each other. They entertained me with stories of their youth, as we turned-off the main route to smoke a little pot his friend offered in exchange for interrupting our date. The next thing I knew, we were on a lonely dead end, country road in the thick of the forest.
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